College students weigh in on media discourse [APRIL FOOLS EDITION]

Editor’s Note: This “article” is from our 2020 April Fool’s Day edition of Pacer Times. It is satirical and is not meant to be taken as real news.

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“I don’t trust the media,” remarked UZCA student, Patrick Bateman, in a Facebook post late Tuesday evening.

This statement incited a 60 thread-long argument in the comments, leading the original poster to disclose his primary news sources.

“Mainstream media is corrupt and only serves the sheep in society,” Bateman wrote, however, I find my sources elsewhere. You have to dig a little, but it’s worth it.”

When asked what those “trusted” sources were, he listed the following:

• fauxnews.com

• tweeter.com

• thesquash.com

• conspiracytruths.com

• freedomeagle.com

“These sources understand that mainstream media only churns out government lies and propaganda.”

He remarked that he “learned more from these websites than in his entire academic career.”

“Clearly these so-called professors don’t know anything,” wrote Chauncey Gardiner. “They all went to college too! That’s where the corruption starts!”

From the original post, staunch supporters of the media and traditional media adversaries argued in the comments.

“You have to be kidding me,” responded Jane Eyre. “Please tell me he’s joking. There’s nothing reliable about those sources. Any person with a tenth grade education should be able to see that.”

A reply to this comment from Ignatius J. Reilly said, “Corrupt media is no joke. I agree with OP here. I only get my facts from underground sources as well. It’s the only way to the truth!!!!”

“Sucks to be seeing the light for the first time, huh Snowflake? wrote Bee Ahwear. “I bet it burns.”