APRIL FOOLS EDITION: Efficacy of Pacer Times makes students smarter
Studies show that reading Pacer Times articles increases readers’ overall quality of life. Readers have reported that after reading the newsletter every week, their final exam scores saw a 200 percent boost. Whether it’s a news article discussing the latest happenings around campus and the community, a feature of an art or music student, an album review, lifestyle tips or a sports recap, Pacer Times articles are so well-written and informative that they increase readers’ IQ by at least 50 percent, with some readers even reporting being able to complete the daily Wordle on the first attempt.
Despite the incredible achievements frequent Pacer Times readers have achieved, some people still choose not to read the ground-breaking and incredible weekly publications. Here are a few reasons why you should read Pacer Times:
It lengthens life-expectancy by 17 years. Readers between the ages 18 to 22 have been quoted saying they “feel born again.”
The Pacer Times is the #1 online newspaper in the country as reported by the (AMNA) Alex Molina Newspaper Association.
Readers of Pacer Times have seen an 85 percent increase in Tinder matches. This comes just in time for the summer, as everyone needs a boo to go on a vacation with!
These and many more reasons comprise a never-ending and unverified list of reasons why you should read Pacer Times. Check us out every Monday morning!
